Do you "let them" hurt? Or step in?

support
boundaries

#1

It can be so difficult to see our loved ones hurting. Do you think it’s helpful or harmful to allow our loved ones to feel the pain that comes from their choices?


#2

Thanks @Jacqui,
I absolutely believe, that in my case, swooping in and rescuing has been Less Helpful over time than allowing my loved ones from feeling the pain that comes from their choices.

My son did suffer and wallow in his illness. Still, It has been a slow and punctuated descent and ascent. I am hopeful and steadfast and quiet about his recovery. I don’t want to scare the fairies. It is that precious to me.

In 100% of my interactions- me, the mother, I gave every thing I could- my money-time-abilities, to reduce the long-term implications of his behavior. Over ten years, my son has begun to understand life’s challenges and he is humbled and working with a sponsor for the first time in real time. But for me, I am determined to step off his robe and let him do his life.

I can’t step in, because he has this.:hatching_chick:


#3

Thank you for sharing your experience, @Thinkstet! It sounds like you’ve also felt some pain that has come from your choices, and have learned from them! So glad to have you here, sharing your story.

Amazing that he’s working with a sponsor!! What a giant step for him.

You’ve both got this! :hugs: