We spend so much time thinking about how to communicate with our loved one and convince them to change. I’m interested, what has been a turning point conversation for you and your loved one? When and why did it happen? What did you say? And how did things change?
The way we communicate can be very powerful. Love to hear what’s worked and perhaps even what’s not worked for you!
Have you ever had a turning point conversation, one where things shifted?
Jane
#1
katie
#2
Not a verbal conversation - but part of dad’s inpatient rehab was an invitation to family members to write an Impact Letter to their loved one in the program. I actually forgot about this letter until you asked this question @Jane!
I spent a long time drafting my letter about how dad’s addiction had impacted me and gave it to his counselor (as instructed) who shared it with dad when he felt the timing was ‘right’ in his program (probably week 3 of 4). This was probably the first time that dad really heard (as in, his brain was clear & sober!) all the ways in which his addiction had hurt/embarrassed/frustrated/annoyed/scared me (etc etc). He gave a sincere apology after he read the letter - and I think there was a big shift in seeing how his habits & behaviors reach beyond himself. It might be something to lean back on if needed in the future.
(Apparently I’m better in writing because I share in this post about writing a letter, too. 
)
Julie_Smith
#3
How to help loved one face the problem - keep reaching out, showing concern for troubling behavior, mentioning to them what you see and letting them know you love them and aren’t there to judge them. This is how my son and I were able to have an honest conversation about his use and get him started on medication assisted treatment. Creating a nonjudgmental space of concern and interest for their well-being can lead to them being willing to be helped.