How do I handle this?



I’m not ocd but I like a clean, organized home that will be welcome to all who enter without being embarrassed to open the door. Since my grandson came here almost a year ago, my home looks like a bomb exploded. The only clean rooms in the house is my bedroom, bath, and the kitchen. He has his stuff piled everywhere. Says it is his business and leaves nightly to make a “sale” of various products. He’s smoking heroin and molly and who knows what else. Swears he’s not dealing and is trying to put his life together. He sleeps on the sofa because the bed in his room in not accessible. I want to reclaim my home. Thinking of giving him 7 days to get the mess cleared up or will rent a storage unit for one month (only) and have him put his business products there and if he loses it all, not my problem. Doesn’t pay a cent to stay here or contribute food, utilities, etc. I hate for him to be on the streets but it’s time I think of myself and my needs for a change. Anyone have a better idea? It’s like living an episode of Horders. I have to clear a path to walk from one room to another. Am 75 years old and broke my hip in a fall about 2 years ago.


In my opinion he is already running the streets, using your home as storage and a place to rest up before going back out on the streets.


You are partly correct I’m certain. The “stuff” he brings home is from shopping for resale and there is no room here to store it, yet more keeps coming in. How would YOU handle this situation?


More than likely I would try to manage the situation for a while, reason with him, eventually throw him out and clean up the mess.


When I say a mess, I don’t mean everyday clutter from items not put away. My 1,725 sq ft home is stuffed full in every room except my bedroom, bath, and the kitchen which I must constantly clear. It’s cases of football trading cards, an umbrella patio table in a huge flat box, outdoor chairs, a case of memory foam bedroom slippers, artwork, books, toys, nic-nacs – all stuff to sell but it has turned into a game of accumulation instead of distribution. I have cleaned the garage twice, organizing down to nuts and bolts. He came in and undid all my work and started to re-do to his own specs but never finished. Boxes and empty boxes everywhere. Horder Horror. I think it is a symptom of drug use, which he denies but barely hides. I can’t clean it up. No longer know where to start. Reading how to do an intervention. The rest of the family will join. Can’t live like this.


@mccoolbusiness24, your situation sounds almost like mine. She is in recovery and not taking drugs, but she is ADHD, which I’m beginning to recognize as the reason for her not being able to make decisions about keeping/tossing/donating clothes, crafts, decorations, chotski’s, etc. I did try breaking this down into smaller tasks (one box versus 97 boxes), but she still can’t make the decisions. As I’ve said, I’ve given up for now. Maybe someday…


@Mccoolbusiness24- I am going to answer this in the PeerGroup10 forum instead of the general discussion section. Thanks.