How someone can do so well in recovery for 4 months and then poof backslide?

relapse
#1

Hello my Village Family, I could not have made it for so long without you. I’m still going through it all. My son was clean since May 20th when he tried to take his life. We were on the road to tying up all loose ends so he could get dried out, but the Sunday before that he decided, well the bottle decided, that it wasn’t going to have it. Anyway, it was the worst day of my life. I found my son like that, overdosed pretty much, in the hospital with tubes.

Maybe because I’m so darn confused. I was told he would have slips, which he did a couple of times, but then he went completely backwards for 3 days. His mood was, excuse my language, but a total a******.

He went to AA drunk. I took him there like that on purpose, they turned him away of course because he smelled like liquor so he went downstairs feeling like crap. The guy came around the office door, went downstairs and outside wrapped his arms around my son and asked him if he was ready and my son said yes.
(Just a little notation actually I’ll talk to you more in the comments about that.)

I am so confused as to how someone can do so good for 4 months and then poof backslide we’re back up on our feet now (hopefully) again but I think this is for real this time I think he was maintenance drinking to keep us fooled.

I love you the village you are my family.

#2

Hi @Denise_Alarid, sounds like you’re going through a lot, feel free to message me and we can set up a time to chat if you’d like. Regarding slips/lapses, it can be a part of the process unfortunately. But I’m glad to hear he’s back on his feet.

It’s really remarkable how much we can recognize our own resilience in these situations. It is SO HELPFUL in managing what you’re going through on a day to day basis. This quality helps you bend without breaking, maintain mental calmness, health, strength, and gives the ability to bounce back after a set back or disappointment. This is gained through self-care and recognizing what you can and cannot control.

How have others coped with their loved one’s setbacks in recovery?

#4

Hi Erica,
I have trouble accepting that this is part of the process? Is relapse and getting clean an endless cycle? Is there hope for true recovery-longterm life long? have you met any heroin addicts who have never used again? I often wonder…If I’m setting myself up for a miserable life with these cycles???

Is is possible to neve relapse again? Or is this the reality of this chronic disease…

#5

Reality is it’s an individual process with many factors that affect the trajectory. With CRAFT tools we teach we can help and feel better along the way with them. Nothing is ever certain but lots of people do recover. Slips can be part of the change process and don’t indicate that someone can’t recover, just that more support is needed and the recovery process needs to be re-evaluated.

A note from the Village :love_letter:: Our Coaches are CRAFT certified and uniquely expert in training families to face addiction and get through recovery together. If you are interested in additional support, check out our online CRAFT programs at wethevillage.co.

#3

Hi @Denise_Alarid how are you getting on, love to hear an update from you <3