I recently attended my first al-anon meeting, and am seeking support - any advice?



My partner, as well as many family members, is/are an addict. I’ve experienced many forms of addiction via loved ones and close friends, and today was my first real step to my own recovery of codependency. As I’ve begun to learn, I am a codependent. I gravitate towards those I felt needed “fixing”, and have issues with controlling these impulses to help those when I am the one who needed help, as well. It’s been…rough. This has been a long time coming, and I’ve always struggled with self-image related issues. It’s my time to care for myself rather than spending what little emotional currency I possess on those who need to help themselves first and foremost.
Any advice, support, or even kinds words would be very helpful to me in this moment.


Glad to have you with us @Zander - for me it’s my partner too and I know what that journey can be like.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Addiction is a chaotic circumstance. And it makes human sense that we want to try to help!


I’m glad you found this space. The tools of Al-Anon have been extremely helpful for me. My husband is a recovering addict. Al-Anon helped me shift the focus from him and everything that I felt was wrong with him, to me and what I could control about myself. It helped me embrace spirituality as a powerful tool not just in recovery but everyday life. Keep going to meetings, find one that fits, take what serves you and leave the rest.

This community is also very helpful - just reading other people’s stories and knowing you’re not alone can be enough. I’ve found great resources through this site - the CRAFT method which is not widely communicated to people who love addicts but is pretty spot on when it comes to approach.

I hope you’re able to find peace, love and support, wherever you are.