My son is in my hometown but is on the run. He and a friend robbed someone. He won’t talk to me or have anything to do with me. I just want him to turn himself in and take responsibility for his actions. Now he’s deleted all family from fb instagram everything…my heart is breaking. I’m worried I’m going to get that phone call that I pray I don’t get!
What can I do about my son who is on the run?
Good advice Chris! My son is running around somewhere, but I always remind him he is loved.
Janine
Jane
#2
@Lynette_Swartwood this is so tough. Sending you love and strength through the worry of this.
I recall that your sister was in contact with him at one time - would she be able to reach him? Or any other friends who care about his wellbeing?
Also, have you had any professional in your local community who’s been helpful? I’m thinking if you could get ahead of the confrontation with law enforcement and get your son on the path to some treatment facility he might be able to avoid prison cycles.
Maybe that’s wishful thinking on my part - I haven’t had this experience myself so I can’t speak from personal experience.
Love to hear from other community members that may be able to provide more informed experience of what’s happened in their situations.
Hi Lynette,
So this one hits home. I have two out of 5 who are now in recovery but it was like going through hell and back x5!. So what changed it all for our family , was a banding together and letting our son know he was loved but that when he was ready for help we would all be here. You have to remember that this is his journey and although you want him to do stuff, at the end of the day its not about what we want.
I’d suggest that you attempt a reach out to him, keep it simple tell him you love him, and that you’re here when he’s ready for help, and most importantly he’s worth it. and nothing more. We have to eliminate all the “junk” in the way of the big picture, which is getting him into treatment . If you need some additional guidance feel free to call or text .
Good luck,
Kris
508-212-7206
erica
#5
@Lynette_Swartwood I can imagine how painful this must be, and I hope you know that you are not alone in dealing with situations like this.
@Jane hit on a lot of good points:
And I’d just add that if he does wind up getting arrested the silver lining is you’ll have peace of mind knowing where he is, and hopefully he gets sent to a treatment facility instead of prison. In addition you can also use this as a jump start for a conversation about his actions while under the influence.
If possible, try and get names and numbers of people near him (friends, social services, locals who know him) to reach out to - this can help ease your mind until you can get in contact with him. It would also be beneficial for you to know where the potential jails are, as well as hospitals and nearby treatment centers so you can be prepared for whatever the outcome once you make contact.
Food for thought: Our loved one’s struggling with substance use aren’t “bad” people trying to become “good”, they are “sick” trying to get "well. Let us know how everything goes 
Kim i took ur advice reached out to one of his friends she said hes still alive but struggling with turning himself in i just messaged the friend and asked her if i could leave a message to him on her phone and she show him n shes going to please please pray for him
erica
#7
@Lynette_Swartwood I’m so glad to hear that you got in touch with one of his friends, it’s a small step but it’s progress. Thinking of you and hoping you connect with him soon.
Hey Lynette,
Checking in, Im not on this site as much as Id like to be, so I apologize for not being around. How is your son doing? Is there anything I can help you with ?
Kris
Recovery coach & family advocate
Ambrosia treatment center
508-212-7206
katie
#9
Thank you for keeping us in the loop, @Lynette_Swartwood. This sounds heartbreaking.
I hope you’re able to send a message through his friend to remind him of his value to you & your family, and that you’re here to support him when he’s ready to take action on the best option for him.
That “when he’s ready” part is painful, isn’t it? Thinking of you, friend.