The holidays can be difficult when spending time with family members struggling with addiction. What are some challenges coming up for you this week?
I think my husband may have slipped in the last few weeks. I’m not sure, though. We had family come into town this past week so it’s been really busy, and for the most part he seems fine. But there are little behaviors that are triggering suspicions. I decided to wait until after the holiday to bring it up to him.
I’m thankful that we were still able to have a really nice holiday with family all week, despite not knowing. That’s something that I’ve learned through years of this recovery thing - that joy and happiness is still possible whether they’re using or not. I can feel the fear and suspicions really take hold though, and when I do, I say a small prayer to myself to ground into the moment and remember that it will be okay. I remember Thanksgiving when he was in full blown active addiction, and how hard that was without any kind of support or tools to get through each day. I spent a lot of that Thanksgiving worrying, crying, and feeling lost and alone. I’m thankful that today I know I’m not alone, and things can always get better.
That is huge progress for sure, and definitely not something to ignore or take lightly. And when you’re in a good place mentally and emotionally, you can respond to the situation from a good place. Creating that safe space can certainly help foster more open, honest communication.