I saw this video today (link below) about how the addicted brain works, and it got me thinking about this thread and what you’re going through currently @Letty14 @Lara @Ellie910 @Anelson0524. I remember in a We The Village group with @erica, she also explained how addiction affects the brain’s reward system and dopamine. People use and drink because they’re trying to feel “normal” by upping their dopamine through substances. When they finally detox, their tolerance for dopamine is much higher than it used to be, and now they may be looking for something, anything, to get to the level they’ve become used to. In many cases, that’s sex. So when they’re in rehab, they’re getting that high from the closest thing possible, which isn’t their partner. In addition, others in rehab have this shared experience and they are in close quarters, so it just makes it easier to cheat.
I am by no means saying this is an excuse for cheating. But hopefully it helps to understand addiction and how it hijacks the brain. People aren’t in their right mind when they’re using, and they’re not really in their right mind freshly detoxed, either. The healing process can and often does take a lifetime, which is why recovery never truly ends. Building back that trust takes a lot of healing within the brain first.