The Newcomer's Welcome: What brings you to Village?

welcome
newcomer
#158

Hi @Kerry, thanks for sharing and so happy you’re here. Like @Jane said, feel free to reach out to me 1:1. I can relate to your situation, it’s so difficult to be in the industry and love someone who is suffering. For now I hope this space provides you with a little of what you need, zero judgement :yellow_heart:

#161

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 10 new members this week: @Suzm @dcarr4 @Amanda_Bartlett @randalta @TheGardenSage @gina1014 @dmoh @Wendy @BreakinBad74 @livenlikelarz

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sun_with_face:

#160

So glad you’re here with us :heart: gets more wonderful with each who joins @Ladnav!

#162

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 14 new members this week: @Sobercoaches4living @Bre @Katie84g @CaseyMarie1112 @Alice_Harvey @aduffy @Ffaks.alor @jackiemayxo @Nb.roxanne @Finleymae1256 @mayabee @Lindaz @Brenda @loualpert

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sunflower:

#163

My name is Donna and my life partner has been in and out of addiction for many years. Our ways of dealing with this have been many so im seeking a community where I can gain knowledge ask questions and just not feel alone

#164

Welcome @dcarr4 glad to have you with us :heart:

#165

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 26 new members this week: @Grace @Trickyholly @steve @andersea @Blondie @alohahome @Rhondw @Dani @wendyw @rmeade @jenngoodrich @andee1080 @Ljn @JanetVBanks @Melissa_Lynn @516amethyst @Louie_Porteria @Alanondaddy @Riley_Koyote @skye211 @SullivanGirl1 @Sarah @Christie @alymitton @bmarshall5 @lorirdh1995

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sunny:

#166

Hi, everyone!!

I have been diving in since I have joined this site a couple of days ago and what a wealth of information there is here! I am looking to connect with people in the same boat that I am and hoping through community exchanges of experiences and knowledge, I will be able to settle my mind and make it up in regards to my relationship all at the same time. Not too much to ask, right? :slight_smile:

#167

Grateful to have you here @Sarah there’s lots of knowledge now and we’re only just beginning. This resource grows with all who join us! :raised_hands:

#168

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 9 new members this week: @Sina @Meagan_A @rebecca217 @Asherr88 @loristrt @Bethany @dreyn @Milly @Loxsy

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sunny:

#171

Hi. Thank you for the welcome. It’s always nice to be acknowledged. My husband is an everything addict. He is currently in recovery and lives in a sober house.
I wish I knew how to ask the community to support me but I don’t. I guess just having people to bounce thoughts, feelings, and ideas around with is what I need the most.

#169

Hi. Thanks for the warm welcome. I have a dear friend who I think is an alcoholic and I am looking for tools to help her. My first step is to investigate how to start the conversation with my friend. Thanks for this site. It’s so helpful!

#170

Thanks for joining us @dreyn it was when my colleague and best friend (now my husband) was struggling with addiction that I dove deep to learn about the topic and how I could help him. I truly believe in and have seen the power of friends and family members to help when we see someone struggling, so I’m so glad we found each other here!

Are you based in NYC?
We’re hosting an intimate gathering on this exact topic: Register to join our Positive Communication Village Gathering and this will be a great place to workshop how to start the conversation with your friend - because part of the agenda is to plan out a conversation using positive communication principles that transform conversations.

Here are two topics from our Playbook you’ll want to check out if you haven’t already:

#172

I recently reconnected with an old classmate that I graduated high school with. We’d been talking for a couple of months when I started to notice a few things that didn’t add up and every time we’d make plans, something always came up. A few weeks ago I stopped by his house unannounced because after talking nearly everyday, I hadn’t heard from him in a couple of days. It was in the afternoon and I believe I woke him up. It seem to throw him off a little bit and I was caught off guard by his appearance (I hadn’t seen him yet since we had started talking). We chatted for a minute uncomfortably and then he said his phone had been broken because of work and that when he got his new one in, he’d call or message me another way. The next day I tried to call from my cell and my house phone but he has blocked me and he hardly speaks to me now. I’ve know him for a long time and thought we were friends before even trying to try something different. I thought it was because of my looks or that I had done something. It was through this that I found out he had gotten hooked on pills and had even been through rehab a couple of times. My heart completely hurts for him and I don’t know what to do. I can only message him through FB and I know he sees it but he doesn’t respond. The last time I heard from him (by text) was yesterday and it was your usual generic talk. I tried to call him that night and it was busy so I’m assuming he blocked me again. I’m not sure what to do and this is my first experience with anything like this. I want to be here for him and be his friend because I feel like he needs one and that frankly he doesn’t have many friends right now. My heart just hurts. Thank you for letting me talk :broken_heart:

#173

That’s really tough to deal with something like that. I know your heart is in the right place but it sounds like if he’s shutting people out, he’s not ready for recovery. He has to want recovery himself and nothing anyone does or says is going to help him. My boyfriend is an opiate/heroin addict and he has been in and out of rehab. When he uses, he starts to isolate himself and will stop picking up calls and responding to messages. There isn’t much you can do unfortunately. All you can do is tell him you care about him and you are here for him when he is ready. That’s what I do with my boyfriend and I just hope that it helps him understand that he is always loved no matter what.

I hope this helps. This site is a great place to talk and receive amazing support so I hope you find what you are looking for. <3

#174

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 46 new members this week: @Lforgia @Lea @Teresa_Woolson @Bethwil661 @kedwards @steph_thedetoxnurse @Ami @larenne97 @doodle789 @citurner @AnnetteM @Mommadoo @Rkoyata @SJS @Kathleen_M_Kelly @Amr_gaber10 @barfoot75 @Brandy @Jaywalker @Tlee22 @jameeking @manumejia1125 @cherubinia @cmcline @Lizzielou @Strongwarrior @Adele @kcochran @Sandropof @Dragonaxe @Sunkie @Karilyn @Vanessa @Cbreland333 @Sextherapyrn @Ksheed @Jennmarie @Anne @MCR @Honeyland @KC1979 @Jlwarren @Ladyjar34 @Alice2019 @Mvillegas78 @Cuzzy

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sunny:

Also, join for our weekly meeting tonight, hosted online at 6pm EST, here’s the link to register <3
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/village-digital-gathering-for-friends-family-affected-by-addiction-tickets-60868231519

#175

Hi everyone,

It’s good to be in this space! My name is Yuqing Wu. First I’d like to share a bit about my family background: I came from a dysfunctional family. Although my parents got divorced when I was 13, I grew up feeling like an orphan due to neglect. My father was seriously psychologically impaired and was not able to really be there as a husband or dad. There were a lot of verbal abuse, physical violence and other dysfunctional behaviors. My mother tried her best to be a good wife and mother. But she was always the “weak” side in their dynamic and habitually succumbed to my father’s demands. She failed to stand up for herself or me.

So that was a bit about my family background. Luckily, a few years ago I was able to work with a great therapist in NYC and through slow and consistent work together, resolved most of my childhood traumas. So from someone who had social phobia, anxiety and depression, I was able to get transformed into a much more sociable and happier person.

I join this space with the hope that I can get support with helping my family members recover from traumas/addictions as well. As much as I hated my father for all his irresponsible and hurtful behaviors, deep down I still care about him as I know he cares about me too. However, when it comes to having contact with him, I find it challenging and exhausting because his acts are still triggering for me and I don’t want to go back to my old place.

I’m grateful for this space and hope to be supported, contribute, and learn with all of you!

#176

Extending a very warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 8 new members this week: @Christopher_Lee_Falc @AmyDrago @Shaelynn_Cunningham @patentcolo @Kjordon @Ann @bean @Lightworker

If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to:

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions! I’m here & happy to help! :sun_with_face:

Also, join for our weekly meeting tonight, hosted online at 6pm EST to get face-face with other Village members and go deeper into CRAFT skill-building.

Tonight’s topic on Positive Reinforcement is a great tool to get away from the frustration and fighting that is all too common when loving someone struggling with substance use.

Here’s the link to see more details and register for tonight’s meetup:

#177

I was in a relationship with an addict for 4 years. He was addicted to any mood altering substance he could easily access…alcohol, pills, coke. Anything that could numb the pain inside him that he never chose to deal with. Long story short, I allowed him to take everything from me. I lost my job, my home, my family, and even my children when he overdosed in my home.
Now I’m in the process of healing and rebuilding. I cut off all contact with him, and he has moved on to another woman who is supporting him. I have a new job, a new (but temporary) home, and am beginning the process to get my daughter back.

#178

Thanks for joining us @Heal4me I can imagine it hasn’t been the easiest road so far, and I bet you have a lot of wisdom to share with this community :heartbeat: